Blogville is my love oh! I decided to do this post as a response to some of the comments I got from the last post on Love and its definition. I'm not eager for boo to say he loves me neither do I think I'm in love with him talk less of saying what other 'small-girls' have said to him. A blogger once commented saying that I was in love hence the motivation to post on the dilemma surrounding the L-word.
My response to most of the comments is in bold. Feel free to continue commenting.
Riri said...
aww,,the L word shall come when the time is right! and you're right people just say they love other people just to feel mature its all lust..lolxx
Yea, its lust I guess. Whenever the time is right
doll said...
any guy that says I luv u within 6 months of meeting me/ dating me is disqualified….d longer it takes 2 say it d surer I am, that u mean it wen u say it…so savor d anticipation of d moment
We've been dating for over a year. I'm not even ready for it. The right time, please,better not be now. I have a degree to complete.
soul child said...
don't worry he would say it...as long as he cares about u and is not messing up...saying i love u is not just an obligation ..ppl think because their in a relationship..they have to say it even if they dont mean it...the L word is losing its authenticity...
Like I said in my post, I was wondering why I wasn't rushing to say I loved him when his girlfriend (when he was 17-18 years) and she was like 16 told him she loved him and here I am. He's now over 21 and I'm not feeling love like his teenage ex.
aloted said...
Hmm...gosh this post just brought back some teenage "He loves me, he loves me not" memories! Ok first of all I don’t blame him for not saying the L word immediately because that word has been debased in some many ways. At the same time I don’t expect him to rub it in your face that “I wont be saying the L word any time soon so don’t hold your breath”. I want to believe he is not doing that. My definition of love can be found in 1cor 13. Love can reveal itself in different forms but the foundation from 1cor 13: 4-8 should be there.Actions surely speaks louder than words, so as long as his actions are showing he loves and respects u...don’t sweat it...the words will come later. The L word should come without fear...There is no fear in love.Also did u say you were under 21...you are still very young so take your time in this love matter cuz u still have many many more years to love. Guard your heart. Make friends, face your studies and have hobbies and be close to God. I am glad both of you are keeping yourselves till you get married…that way if it does not work out all is not lost.Question for you- if he says I love u today (I also don’t recommend u saying it first) would u be able to say I love u too back to him. Ok this comment is becoming very long…..God bless!
God Bless you madam Aloted. The post was more of a question. I stated how i felt about him, many of my friends would just say "you love him," but I won't admit it (I can't believe now is the time for love). I just wanted someone to tell me that my opinion was right that I could really care about someone, share the same beliefs as them, be their friend and NOT love them (except girlfriends and family).
I have a huge head on my body so school comes first, If i didn't care about him so much, I'd rather we weren't dating until I finished with school. He's mature and very responsible, and a great friend. Love can wait.
He wasn't really rubbing it in my face that was like 3yrs ago we weren't a serious couple. He was explaining that he won't throw the word at me or anyone because Love is what you feel for only one person. I was fresh outta secondary school then and I'm actually happy he told me that.
If he tells me he loves me, I wouldn't say it back 'now.'
Funms-the rebirth said...
Aloted has said everything........ I'm sure when hes ready, he'll say it.... don't stress about it... enjoy what u guys r sharing now
I'm enjoying what we have which is puppy love. Sha, I'm not anxious. Dude should just wait until I graduate/ get a life so I don't quit school now because Love is shacking me.
Teeee said...
I agree with you that love is a feeling but it also stands the test of time. Furthermore, love is natural -maybe you're relationship still has to grow. Are you sure he said it and you weren't listening?
Teeee, na wa oh! No he didn't say it. When we first took a break he said he thought he was in love with someone (fit the puzzle he meant me) but our relationship is still growing so I hope he didn't say it.
Beyond said...
I think love is more about the feeling n action rather than the word of the mouth. I will prefer a say say the L-word when he actually means it rather than saying it cos that's what he's expected or suppose to say...Have a great weekend.
At least if there's a teeny bit of love in me, I won't screw up by admitting or even saying it even if he's said it already. I also wrote that it was the actions that mattered not the words in the post (so you're right).
yankeenaijababe said...
Love is when he gives you the last sushi or meat on his plate. How about that. You know every guy loves food and if he is willing to give you the last...he he he. You have found a good thing. Did that help?Enjoy every moment spent with each other... the LOVE thing would just pop.
Unfortunately, I don't eat sushi (hehehe).
Original Mgbeke said...
Ah, me I no sabi wetin Love be o. I've never really experienced it.I think it will come in it's own time...no rush am.
Temite said... Me sef dont know what Love is o dear. I guess love is when you really look out for the person more than anyone else. We're in the same shoes. I'm not anxious to experience love. I have enough time.
I can totally relate. I'm experiencing the 'puppy' version.
Rita said...
Aloted took some words out of my fingers:-) Love is deep. It is one of the sweetest things to imagine and experience. It comes in different forms and it is in everyone (in different degrees) because we are of God who is Love.You can read more about love in some of these links: http://preparingforurking.blogspot.com/2008/09/reciprocity-iii.html http://erolyrics.blogspot.com/2008/07/love-for-season.html
Off to read....
Writefreak said...
Hmmm...i agree the L word has been over used and overrated, people claim to be in love all the time then they say they've fallen out of love...real love endures the test of time. Ok as a married person this is what i would say love is, a commitment, a knowing in your heart that this is the person i want to be with all my life and doing all you can to protect the relationship> Read 1Corinthains 13 and you will get a clear definition of love,the God kinda love, so long as you have those evident in your relationship, then you can confidently say you're in love..Love never fails and it overcomes all trials...yeah it does.
I'm glad you have agreed to keep yourself till marriage, I don't hear a lot of that these days, some of us did make that decision and we haven't regretted it one bit..please don't yield to pressure.
Ok, if you're under 21 as you say, i'd say just take things easy, meet other people (although i met my husband when i was 19 in uni, we were in school together and we dated from our year 3 for 6 and half years till we got married)...
Thanks Writefreak. I hope I can stick to my promise and that I won't regreat it, I shouldn't! Boo actually tried to explain love to me with those same verses. 6.5 years? and you waited that long? Niceeee! We've heard it from a married person oh!
Love you all.
15 comments:
Now I have an idea of what it is. I'm so cynical about love!
Girl i am proud of u...and the decisions u are sticking too...
U have definitely got your head on your shoulders and not on cloud 9 somewhere :)
great uve come to a certain realization...... i also learnt from all d comments people left....... though im still sarcastic about love! glad ur happy boo and dont QUIT school o.....lol
*Stands up and claps*
I'm proud of you and your conviction girl! Trust me, you won't regret it...
All the best with school (first) and love...
Omo dada (good girl). As much as you enjoy being in a relationship, you have a life outside of it that you need to nurture. School is our priority as you're still a maiden. Getting that job after school and being with your guy is achievable but everything in moderation. All the best with your decisions, hun xxx
I'm in love with your blog! lol
Love...I only have a hazy idea what that is but would it be such a bad idea to fall in love while in school..I mean it might be a bit distracting but is love really a thing you can control and lock away until a certain appropriate time..if you feel it..you feel it
Also, I think love comes in various degrees, The way I love my new freakum dress is not d same love I have for my mother but its still love(trust me it is). Love is a feeling, an emotion, not thought based, its foolish..at least I think so. For me Love alone is not a valid enough reason to get married...you have to combine the head and heart to create a fusion of love/commitment and dedication and this leads to true love/real love/deep love..whatever that glue that holds married couples together is called..that love can wait for now
sorry for the thesis :-D hope that made sense tho
stick to your guns and you won't regret a thing. No matter what!
Take care!
Happy new year!
My husband and I dont say, "I love you" to each other everytime. & This has made me hold more value to the words.
When I say them, I mean it.
Theres no point rushing to say the words. The first time I utter those words to my husband (we weren't married then), I ment it. I looked in his eyes & I knew I loves him.
I'm of the opinion that much of what is regarded as love, even the seemingly pure, self-sacrificing kind is rooted in sexual stimulation. I'm not saying that there is no love, its just that I'm not of the opinion that the 'feelings' we see as a prerequisite for healthy relationships or even marriage are even relevant.
I look at mutual gain and similarity of thought, purpose and principle. Everything else is but roving fancy.
And no I'm not a cynic.
all i can tell you is that love is a beautiful thing..
also,it depends on your idea of love ,or what you think it is,that you would be able to recognize and appreciate it.
Perosnally feel that the huge library of romantic comedies we've watched since childhood manages to keep us confused as to what love really is.... The mushy part is fine, but when push comes to shove, its hard nosed pragmatism, digging in and deciding to stay put against all odds........
Well,,, You've been tagged by moi on the 2 truths and 1 le meme thing......... Regards.......
I'm still going to write on love! I've been thinking about it all day! There's no perfect time for love..real love still means you want to be the best person you can be and you can still do well in school. Its not one or the other!
guys dont say the L-word cos its like cuttin away a part of their ego.
u really cant blame 'em (codedly xcludin maself from d context)
ppl grow into things, smtime in future ul both look back and laugh at aw naive u were! (mayb not!)
:)
still tryna figure out d 'L' word. everytime i think i've nailed it, it becomes more enigmatic.
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